Monday, April 21

latest tunes

I bought this Tonic CD "Lemon Parade" 5yrs ago I think, mainly b/c it was on saleand had that song "If You Could Only See". I didn't really listen to anything else on it. Recently I picked it up to listen in the car. There are 3 other tracks on it that I play repeatedly of late. "Mountain" is one I just can't get enough of. this morning on my 20min drive to work I listened to it on repeat 4 times. "Casual Affair" and "Open Up Your Eyes" are also good.
I was chatting with a couple regulars at the local beer hangout - one of them came in with horrible sun-burn. Serious peeling. So I asked the obvious question - were you not wearing sunscreen? to which he replied - do I look like I was wearing sunscreen. My disbelief stems from the fact that this guy is very pale normally, his eyebrows are see-through. I could not believe that he'd even consider going in the sun without slapping on at least an SPF 30. I wear sunscreen and I'm black. I use an SPF 15 moisturizer on my face b/c who needs more wrinkles than necessary, right? Yesterday I went to CVS looking for some general sunscreen for my legs and arms which will be seeing a lot of extra sun now that Spring/Sun is here. I got some SPF 30 stuff. What I found mind-boggling is that there were tons of SPF 30 and 45 stuff but most of the SPF 4(I didn't even know this existed) and SPF 10 was gone. Why is anyone buying SPF 4? People seem way more concerned with being tanned than they are with skin cancer. I don't know why this concerns me but it does.

Friday, April 18

random thoughts

I ran into the dimwit stalker aka the eager-beaver today outside my chinese fastfood place.

FYI - I call him the dimwit stalker b/c his name is a couple letters off from "dimwit" and he just doesn't seem to get it. it's a little mean but it's what I changed his name to in my phone so I could recognize whenever he called me.
anyway, I digress...I saw him as I was parking in the lot behind the take-out place. So I called in my order from the car, then called my friend hoping he'd leave without me having to 'chat'. No such luck. I got out of my car after 5min to go inside to get my order when he suddenly stopped talking on his phone (he was standing near his car and talking while I was in my car). He said hi. I said hi(damn polite manners instilled in me from childhood) while walking. He asked me if I know this girl he teaches (he has asked me about this poor girl about 5 times - every time he's seen me since I decided not to date him again) I say "poor girl" b/c she works at the same company as me and she's one of the couriers so I know who she is and she knows who I am but we don't really chat, we're not friends.
This girl told me that he kept asking her if she knew me(he taught a class she took at a local college). I told her that "yeah, I know who he is, he really should leave you alone, because really....". She laughed, I laughed, so maybe she won't hold his latent stalking against me when she delivers mail to my box. Maybe.

Anyhoo, today he asks me again if I know her. I say yes. He then asks me to tell her hi. Yeah I'm going to do that...never! He then tells me to "keep in touch, don't be a stranger". It is a shame that we live in close proximity and shop at the same grocery and get Chinese take-out at the same place. Shame for me anyway but I refuse to let him stop me from doing what I normally would b/c he's a weirdo.

In other news, she finally admitted to having a crush on the guy I like (Jim). I totally have dibs. Not that it matters since I'm fairly certain that he's not interested in either of us. I told her she could ask him how he feels about her if she wants to know but I can't be involved in any way. I think I can deal with that and not destroy our friendship. She is my friend and I won't allow my jealousy to get in the way of that. I would normally offer to help but not in this case since my feelings are also involved.

He lets me flirt with him and I feel very comfortable with him. If I'm honest with myself I have to admit that he and and I are not really suited. I think we can be good friends though. It's kinda nice to have guy friend to hug regularly whenever I feel like it. Plus he's quick and clever and gets all of the references I make and usually finds them funny too. He's not perfect but who is. I do like him and am just going to enjoy our friendship as it is. I want more, at least I think I do.

Sometimes I wonder if I subconsciously choose to like guys who are unattainable intentionally. And if that is so, maybe I will choose the right one someday, when I am ready for a real relationship as opposed to a fantasy one.

Sometimes I think I'd like to have a quick fling with him (or maybe not so quick ;). I am very attracted to him. But that's not me, it's just not something I'd do unless I was very, very, very drunk. A state I am determined to avoid in the near and immediate future. This is easy normally. When we go out Thursday/Sat nights, as we've been doing recently, I drive there and have to drive home afterwards. This means 1 drink on Thursday nights since we're only out for 3-4hrs and about 2 drinks on Sat. nights - I usu steal sips from my friends drinks if they have something different from me. We're usu out from 8:30 till 1 or 2am so there's plenty of time for my barely 5' body to process that alcohol. I am normally very social but one drink is usu enough for me to be extra flirty and clever :)

Our nightly outings have led to some really cool meetings with people I probably would not have met any other way. I even met group of Aussie rugby players a couple weeks ago. They were all wearing shorts even though it was maybe 35-40° outside. Why were they in upstate NY to play rugby? I can't imagine and didn't ask but I'm sure am glad they came. I of course walked up to one of them and asked him if he was an Aussie(after hearing his accent drift over) - to which he replied, "Yeah, I'm an Aussie" in his wonderful accent. This guy had slightly long, curly blond hair and pretty blue eyes, maybe 6'3" and was very well built. I then had to ask him to say something to me in his wonderful accent. He asked "what do you want me say?" I said, say " I love you..." and he said it. I then continued talking to him and another Aussie guy for the rest of the night.

My friend Z says "you are such a flirt". It's true. I am, but of course there is a line and I don't go home home or make out with any of these random guys I flirt with but it's kinda nice to talk to cute guys and have them respond in kind. Not all of the guys are cute and funny, sadly. Some are annoying but mostly they are a nice bunch and there are 'regulars' we usu see there. It's a great beer-bar.

Of course my 5-yr college reunion is coming up next month. I do plan to drink, of course, but probably just enough to get and keep my buzz going - probably in the ballpark of 2-4 drinks a night. At least that's the plan. I'm really hoping that my crush from college comes to reunion (Lit). I have this idea that after 5yrs, he'll suddenly realize what a fool he was to reject me back then and will beg me to give a him another chance. A girl can dream, can't she? Dreams don't cost anything.
Speaking of dreams, I should be having a few to bed.

Sunday, April 6

new tunes

I recently finished reading "The Outlaw Demon Wails"...Kim Harrison's 6th book in her Rachel Morgan series. It was totally worth the wait. It about this witch who lives with a vampire and a pixy family in an old church and the world she calls the Hollows. It's a great read if you're into that kind of fiction - urban fantasy it's called. If you like books about vampires/witches/elves/werewolves and the like, this series might be for you.

I read about how music inspires her on her site and recently bought a new CD based on this - Best of Corvus Corax (cool review here). It is the coolest sound I've heard in a while. If you hate bagpipes, it's probably not for you. They are a medieval rock band. I didn't even know that such bands existed. They totally rock though. If there was rock music back then, it would have sounded like this.

This is the kind of music they should have used in the movie "A Knight's Tale". Maybe I would have liked the movie if they had. Even if they still had them play "we will rock you", it would have been better on medieval instruments. The electric guitars and drum kits really killed it for me. But I digress.

Here's a YouTube video set to one of my fav songs on the CD "Mille Anni Passi Sunt". The track Harrison mentioned was "Filii Neidhardi" which is another fav of mine as it reminded her of one the elves in the story.

I can't keep still when I hear most of the tracks on this CD.

Saturday, April 5

in the moment

That guy from the gym finally asked me out. It only took him a year or so. He asked if he could take me out for my bday which is next week. So we went out tonight and it was much more fun than I anticipated. We chatted for quite a while - we met just after 7pm and had a wait for our table but by 7:40 we were seated. We left at 10pm. The time just flew by. He suggested that we should do this again. I agreed. I didn't have high expectations for dinner so I am kind of surprised at how much I enjoyed tonight.
If nothing else comes of it, that's fine. I'm trying to live more in the moment, enjoying each good one as it comes and trying not to look too far ahead.