Monday, January 30

The new guy Sam

The new guy Sam...has dimples. Just noticed this recently and almost commented on how cute they him. Luckily, I just smiled and nodded and went on my way without saying anything about them. Phew!

First day at school

Didn't do much on Sat, didn't even leave my apt to get my mail. A couple friends were going to the movies but I passed on that. One, I was pretty much in my jammies (ok so I'd been in said jammies all day ;) and was planning on having a long evening bath. Plus wasn't crazy about the movie and also I'm broke. And I've found that if I stay out of the mall, I don't spend money. Funny that. The truth is that I just didn't feel like being out around people. So I opened my windows and curtains and enjoyed the sunshine from my living room during the day. Finished 2 books, one so-so and the other pretty good. And watched tv.

Sun much to my surprise I actually got out of bed and went to the gym. Totally unheard of for me. I always plan to maybe get there sometime on the weekend but normally just don't. We didn't have choir this weekend so it was a perfect opportunity to go before Mass. So I went and worked out and felt pretty good about it. Was a couple min late to church but it was fine.

I wanted to go to the gym Sun b/c I would had my rest day on Sat and since class was starting Mon I didn't think I'd feel like going after that. So it's good now b/c I exercised yesterday, so I was able to come straight guilt.

The class was a little boring especially near the end. He read stuff off of powerpoint slides (word for word in most cases), a few of them he gave a little more info that what was on said slides.
I'm always bored by lecturers at seminars/classes where they read everything exactly as they are on the slides. Not a summary of the slides but word for word. I feel like I could have saved some time by just reading the slides in my own time. I could read it much faster on my own. If little or no additional information is given, what's the point? I think my main problem is that I'm a note-taker. I good lecturer to me gives little asides here and there, tying stuff together, this I can write down...the connections. But I sense that this class is going to be one where I'll just have to memorize stupid mechanisms and other crap. I get numbers. They make sense to me. Calculations made sense to me. That's why I have problems with this class and had problems with a couple other organic chem classes in college. I could see the point in the numbers, the calculation, the formulas all seemed to lead somewhere. I could work out most problems in other chem classes from basic principles. Organic chem does not really deal with numbers. NO formulas, few calculations. Just stupid facts. Facts that don't make a lot of sense to me and facts that I don't care to commit to memory. I'm not really surprised that the class is mostly about memorizing facts, it's just boring, is all.

I had a hard time paying attention during the last 30min. Maybe b/c it's the first class and he was giving examples of work we were going to cover during the class. Maybe it'll get better. No term paper but we have to bring in current scientific journal articles on selected topics and hand them in. What I don't quite understand is how exactly he's going to determine if/how much we've learned. No tests/quizzes. Just seems way too subjective to me. We do have to give 10min presentations (powerpoint slides included) on a particular topic. Is he basing our grade on that? The literature articles we have to hand in (we have 5 or 6) have to have been published in the last 12 months - this does make it a little more challenging b/c it means I will have to look for new stuff (can't use ones I have already used during the course of my job-will have to search the literature :P. Plus he said that it had to be an interesting article, something showcasing an exciting aspect of a particular class of compounds. I think I'm in the wrong field b/c I would be lying if I said that I've ever come across a chemistry journal article that I could describe as exciting. Interesting? Maybe. Mostly I just go straight to the experimental section which gives details for reactions similar to ones I have to do. Most of the biological data is Greek to me anyway.

So I just don't know. I am trying to keep an open mind even though it may seem that way (about paragraphs) I just don't care about the why behind the reactions. I don't care. That's my real problem right there. I just want to get my work done. I learn new reactions as I go along and it mostly depends on the customer - the targets we make. The way I make them depends mostly on my supervisors. I'm a pair of hands. Sometimes it seems like they think a monkey could do it. Sometimes I feel like a monkey could do it. Most of the time I'm ok with this. Even if I did more or tried to do more, I'm the only BS chemist in my group. BS=Bottom of the food chain. Even if I made a good suggestion, it's only good if someone else with a PhD makes it, even if its the same thing I suggested - it's only valid if they say it. After stuff like this happens several times, you do one of 2 things. You 1)leave and do something else or 2)you suck it up and accept it or are bitter and complain all the time about it. In either case you do your job as well as you can and keep most of your suggestions to yourself. I've accepted it and am only a little bitter. Some of this may seem defeatist. And maybe it is but it's the view from my eyes. Someday, I'm going to find a job that I can do that I'm really motivated to go to. One where I feel like I truly make a difference, am more than just a pair of hands. Someday. For the moment this is all I'm trained to do. So it's what I'm doing for now.

That was much longer than I planned...guess I had more to say about all this than I realized.

Saturday, January 28

Watching Forrest Gump

I love this movie. I've watched it more than 10 times all the way through. Still love it.

The wonders of decaf tea

After 5 days sans caffeine I was having a hard time. I bought some lemon tea and chamomile(for night) and I also already had blueberry tea (all these are herbal, naturally caffeine free and all that :P)They just couldn't cut it though. So I'm going to stick with the decaf for a bit - which still has caffeine but really low levels and try to wean myself off it.

I usu have tetley british blend which has more tea per bag than other teas and I usu leave the bag in for 2 min. It's really good tea. Normally the decaf tea at work (we get free tea/coffee) is not something I use often (swill is the word that comes to mind). Not that bad but I would have to leave the tea bag in the cup for at least 5 min before adding creamer for it to come close to what my reg tea is like after a min. After 5 days though, that decaf tea tasted pretty good to me. I usu have 1 cup/day around 10am at work. That's when I need it most. First thing in the am I usu have cereal/oatmeal and OJ and I'm good till ~945am then I start needing my morning cuppa. I occasionally would have tea in the afternoon and night but not often.

A couple of my reactions didn't go as I expected and I mistakenly identified one of the side-products as my product and used in the next step. this sucks because now I can't take it any further and I've wasted material I could have used. Plus I made this other compound but it's only 89% pure and I only a very small amt of it and we need to have stuff at least 98% pure. The process I need to use to purify it will probably eat through most of it. A real bummer. But it's done and I gotta stop worrying about it now cause I'm not at work now. Mon will come soon enough. Didn't sleep well last night at all. Ruminating on my life and had a bit of a crying jag about many things. Mostly about Lit. Feel better now in the light of day.

Thursday, January 26

Days when you wish you had a camera-phone

In the bathrooms at work, there was this person(s?) who'd use the toliet then leave without flushing. Where did these people grow up? in the forest? without indoor plumbing? Or are they trying to conserve water? My take-conserve water at home.
So I took action. Made 3 signs "PLEASE be considerate and FLUSH" (one for each stall) and stuck them on the inside of each door - hoping to shame the nasty who kept doing their business and leaving it for others(me) to find. This helped and after about a week, amazingly, whoever it was, started flushing. So nice when people act civilized.

Today, I wanted a camera-phone b/c someone is apparently not aware of how temperamental the toilets can be - you have to flush b/t your business and if much tissue paper is needed, then you need several flushes. Must be someone new. Anyhoo, there was a sign written on a paper towel - "Toilet plugged up - do not use". I noticed said sign in the mirror while I was brushing my teeth, and had to turn around to see if I was seeing correctly(backwards in the mirror). Then I laughed, almost swallowed toothpaste, and laughed some more. I thought the warning was a nice touch-saving innocents from unnecessary exposure to nastiness. Must have been one of the new people.

Back to school

I'm going to take a graduate level chem class, my job is paying. They asked if I wanted to do it - along with 4 other people from our site who are BS or MS level chemists. Actually they strongly suggested that I take it. So I said yes (had to decide this on Tues - Tues being the day they suggested this. And they were so pleased I couldn't take it back. Can you believe it? the dang class starts Mon.

Since they're paying for it and will allow me the time to do it (mostly, my understanding is that I can leave earlier on the class days). It's supposed to be twice a week for 1 1/2 hr. We can take it for credit(towards eventual MS degree) or audit. They pay either way. I'm going to do it for credit cause I figure I may end up getting the MS degree and I won't work any less at it if I just audit it so I might as well. This has all happened so fast, I think I'm still in shock :) At least I already know 3 other people in the class.

I have been out of school for 3 1/2 yrs. I'm not worried about it though. I'll do my best. College was great for me, I was a very good student. Only thing is that I didn't ahve to work full-time while I was in college. I was lucky and even though I had campus jobs, I didn't work more than 20h a week. Junior and senior year, I probably worked no more than 12-15hrs/week. I had loans and help from my sis and just did without extra stuff.

I just hope he doesn't expect us to be writing anything remotely like a term paper. It's chemistry and theory based (no lab is required) so most likely he won't. I hated term papers then and I don't think 3-4 yrs has changed my mind about them. Hopefully, some of my work experience will help with the class. I'll just have to wait and see.

Steer into skid

Last night on my way home I took a different street from normal (there are 2 streets I can take to the street my apt's on). As I started the turn onto my street, there was this huge sheet of ice...and my car...'danced' on it for about 5sec. I was like shit, shit, foot off gas/brake...steer, steer, steer. Luckily no-one was illegally parked on the curb (like they usually are) and no cars were trying to come out at the same time I was at the corner. So I was able to just steer (sorta) until my car got over the black ice. Scary but I handled it.

I had a car accident 2 years ago on black ice...I was joining main traffic on highway and my car skidded from the edge of the exit into on-coming traffic. My car was facing the median and I was hit on driver's side. Seconds before, I could hear and see cars whizzing by me on either side. Then I realized I was going to be hit and I ducked away from the window. Good thing since my driver's side window was shattered and there was a huge crack in the windshield. The driver's side door was pushed in about 6 inches. The car was totaled but I was very lucky and only lost my glasses, banged up my leg and had problems with my lower back. But nothing was broken. I didn't even get cut. So lucky when I think about what my car looked like after the accident. The other guy wasn't hurt much either, I think he had a sprained ankle.
It was scary and I thought I was going to die. For months after, I would hear the noise of the crash (crunching metal/breaking glass) in my head at random times, sometimes while driving. I started driving 4 days after(with crutches in tow). I got my current car 12 days after the crash. The skid brought this all back to me. My friend D thinks maybe I started driving again too soon after the accident. But what else could I do. You do what you have to do and you try to move on from things like this. At least I had all my limbs. Maybe that's when I started losing my mind? Just kidding. That's D's theory anyway well sort of. She thinks my current anxiety started from then. I'm not so sure about that.

Tuesday, January 24

I think I've really fixed it this time

Ok, so I think I've really fixed it this time. Went into my settings on blogger and found...13 comments...that I've never seen before. Granted 3 of them were ads. I'm sorry I missed them at the time. Don't think I was ignoring you (my dear readers). Just not very savvy at layout/adapting blog stuff. Just went back to read them. Probably should have just read them while they were easily accessible in the 'moderate comments' section. I have to do things the hard ways always. Sigh! So instead of doing that (reading them there) I published them then realized I'd have to look up each individual post to read them. Silly billy :)

On the iPod: If the World Crashes Down-Enrique Eglesias

My latest toy is this mouse. Still getting used to the buttons. It came last night. My neighbor had to sign for it. Why can't amazon have UPS leave stuff at my door. No one will take it, I live in a really safe neighborhood. Plus the stuff in the box cost about $25. I can uderstand if its an item over $100. But having to sign for a book/mouse is so ridiculous to me. Don't get me wrong. I love amazon. Estimated arrival date was Jan 27th and it got here Jan 23rd so I'm not complaining about their promptness. That I love.

Something weird

Something weird is happening with my comments again. I get them emailed to me but several of them don't show up on the blog. No clue what's causing this.

Sunday, January 22

I am my own twin

You simply must see this show on discovery health if you the least bit curious about it. It's called "I am my own twin". Mysteries of the human body - both fascinating and scary.

pretty good day

Had a pretty good day. Got up early b/c my body is suddenly on this early clock where I've gotten up before my 600am alarm. Of course no alarm that early today. I did have it set for 730 so I could take me asthma meds but I got up before it went off. Since I was up, decided to have brekfast and watch the sunrise.

At 11am I went to local coffee place for a bagel and a chat with a friend. The weather was beautiful (freakishly warm for Jan 22). It was 60F and clear blue sky. But the time we got back it had started clouding over but at least I was able to enjoy it while it was still fine out. Then there was some rain and wicked winds. By tonight it was quite chilly. Definitely long undy weather. I was underdressed for it when I left the apt at 4pm. Did have a warmer coat in the car which I was able to use though. Temp. tonight is a cool 31F.

Went to have my hair done (relaxed) at 4ish. Actually got done earlier than I thought (630p) and was first at the cinema (in same mall) for the movie. So I enchanged my free movie pass for a ticket to King Kong and wandered around a bit. Been meaning to use said pass for a while, it's been burning a hole in my purse since early Dec when I got it but the movie has to be at least 2wks before you can use a movie pass to see it.

Everyone else got there 5min before the start of the movie and by then tickets were sold out. So I exchanged my ticket and we went to see "Brokeback Mountain" instead. I wasn't terribly keen on either movie but it was the best choice at that point. It was ok. Heath Ledger was so good in this movie-he wasn't Heath in it. Really great job on his part. Jake G was ok but still Jake in a way. Plus I'm more of a Heath fan than a Jake fan.

Then we went for coffee or in my case herbal tea and played Scrabble. At the beginning I actually thought I might win for once but sadly, no win for me again :( It's not too bad, it was fun. Herbal tea is great and all but my body hasn't quite gotten over its need for caffeine, even the small amt I would get in my usu 1 cuppa tea a day. Sigh!

Off to bed. Long but great day.

Saturday, January 21

About a boy

There’s a part in one of my favorite movies, About a Boy, where Hugh Grant’s character, Will, during a voiceover says,

It was torture. For 5 minutes, I realized what life would be like if I were in any way interesting…if I had anything to say for myself…If I did anything. But I didn’t do anything.

This is how I felt yesterday. I am such a dork. I was talking to the new guy, let’s call him Sam. One of the analytical instruments is in our lab and Sam came in to use it just as I was leaving it. So we chatted for a little. Then he asked if I had plans for the weekend. I told him that I planned to see King Kong with a couple friends Sat. And I was wondering if I should ask him come with. So I asked if he’d seen it yet and if he wanted to see it. Perfect opening, right? But he said he hadn’t and that his friends had seen and said it was pretty good. But he didn’t say that he wanted to see it. So I just let it go. Then he asked if I had plans for Fri night. So I said, not really, that I planned to go to the gym, then home, cook and stay in. At this point, I felt like I was the most uninteresting people in the world. B/c I don’t really do anything. And when people (guys) ask what I do for fun, I don’t know what to say. Other than that I read, cook, and watch movies. I mean I like to do other stuff. I paint. Not often though. I would go bowling and play pool more if I had people interested in doing it. I’d paint pottery more. A lot of things aren’t fun if you have to beg/convince people to go, at least not for me. I want to do stuff but I don’t want to have to beg. I ask a few times and when people are reluctant, I just let it go. Maybe I could do more initiating myself.

One of the things the psych doc talked about was that jobs like mine and a few others foster obsessive-compulsive personality’s b/c you need to be precise and you need to repeat and double-check yourself. Mistakes can be costly in more ways than one.
Then she asked if I had any distracters, and the fact is that I don’t. So she said we were going to do something about that. I hope she can help.

Thursday, January 19

No Shit Sherlock

Current song on the iPod: Bring Me To Life...Evanescence. Love this song.

I got to work at 720am. Got the usual comments like the world was ending
Friend E: You're in really early today? (no shit Sherlock, I was a bit annoyed)
Me: I am in early today aren't I?

Friend C: Who are you and what have you done with?(this one made me laugh)
Me: I'm her evil twin, mwah-ha-ha-ha!

Irish Paddy: (does a double-take, looks behind him, then at me) You're all Alias aren't you, but you don't have her schedule right.
Me(slight Irish accent): Well blow me down and shiver me timbers.

I have to start going in early and put a stop to this nonsense. This happens every time I'm early. To be fair, I'm not early often... but when other people are, I say nothing. Wish other people could be more like me ;) Or at least keep their thoughts to themselves. I do know how to shut them up. Maybe I'll just change and start going early from now on. The upside of this is that I would be able to leave earlier at the end of the day. It's great to leave while it's still light out. I've definitely become too predictable.

Saw the psychologist today. Filled a mini-tome in forms. She scheduled my next appt 3 wks from now and not 1 wk from now so I think that's a good sign. I think. Today, I spent half of the time filling out the forms even though I got there 15min earlier like they asked supposedly to get it done then. Apparently the secretary had to go to the doctor so she wasn't there to give me the paperwork early. Not a big deal I suppose. She suggested I give up caffeine(switch to herbal caffeine-free teas instead) for a while-see if that helps me get better night's sleep. Plus she said that caffeine plays a major role in depression/anxiety. She also said that 1 cup tea was just as bad as 1 cup coffee... that even small amounts of caffeine make a difference. I'm not so sure about that. But, I'll try it and see if I notice a difference. I had a small overdose of chocolate a couple days ago (you do not want the details, trust me) and have decided to lay off it for a couple weeks so that'll help as well.

Wednesday, January 18

Forty-eight thousand, five hundred and eighty-nine...sheep

Bonus points if the title sounds familiar and is funny to you :)

I tried to get to bed early last night b/c today we had a videoconference with our client. So I wanted to be fresh and relatively awake for our meeting. I went to bed at 10, actually turned the light off at 10pm. Then I woke up and thought, it can't possibly be morning already. I turn on the light and its morning but the wee morning (12:45am). So I turn the light off and go back to sleep. I woke up several times after that at 230am, at 430am and then at 630am. That's when I finally got out of bed. A wreck. The meeting was 2hrs long and it was tough staying awake. Especially since I had to just sit there. People from a couple other depts were at the meeting and they presented slides as well as our clients. We (me and the guys in my group) mostly just sat there and nodded. Well, they nodded. Some of the info was interesting and some wasn't. Some I understood and some made no sense to me at all. Mostly it was bio and modelling data and theories about some of the compounds we made. 2hrs of Biochemistry/chemistry in slides will do that to you. Had to dress up today-I took my 'dress' clothes in on a hanger and changed just before the meeting at 10am. Can't talk to clients in my usu 'work clothes' = jeans and tee.

So I have my 1st appt tomorrow with a psychologist. Going to work early tomorrow since I'll have to leave by 345pm for my appt. Still in 2 minds about the counselling thing. But I am more receptive to that than medication, at this point anyway.

The perfect salsa

Oooh, I finally found it again. I found this perfect store-brand fresh salsa and it's so yummy but I forgot which store I got it from. So during the past 2 weeks I've been on a vain until last night when I finally found it again. Tucked in the freezer section next to where the pillsbury frozen stuff is. And it was only in that particular branch. Note to self-must remember this location.

Sunday, January 15

5F and 4" snow

We had a total of 4" of snow. Its 5F outside now, windchill at freakin -15F. Winter's baa-ack. There's a new guy at work who from Texas and its his first winter here. He was a little freaked out by the 1-2" snow/30F weather we had 2 weeks ago. I told him-that's nothing, just you wait. Can't wait to see what he thinks about having to brush snow off his car when the windchill is negative double digits. For some reason, I am looking forward to this. Guess my sis is not the only one with a slight mean streak ;)

View from my window

This is the same view from my window tonight. I drove home in this. It was something out there. Lots of wind, light sleet but mostly wind gusts blowing the snow around. I drove 10-20 mph all the way home. Saw "Glory Road" after dinner at japanese steakhouse. It rained for most of the morning and I just stayed in. Didn't do much except read and laze around for most of the day. Had I known it was going to be as windy/snowy out there, I'd have bailed on going out tonight for sure. But, I was fine, I drove slowly and had fun. So glad I didn't know the weather ahead of time :)
I really enjoyed the movie. It was either that or Hoodwinked which I kinda wanted to see but not $10 keen. Definitely more in the mood for Glory Road. By the time we finished dinner, we only had time to make it for Glory Road, Hoodwinked had started already so I was kinda glad it worked out that way. I think Hoodwinked might be better as a cheaper show like a matinee.

Planning to get out early to take pics of the snow. I love snow, more so when I'm not driving in it. I trumped through 2-3 inches of it on my way in tonight. Had to park in the boonies. Still, there's nothing quite like walking through freshly fallen fluffy snow. Makes me think of my college roomie. She loves the snow and back in college we'd often go out walking in it...just to experience it (the freshly fallen snow). She usu made snow angels while I watched. NO making snow angels for me. Walking through the snow. Touching it occasionally with my hands. All good. Wallowing in it and getting covered and cold and wet from it - not so good. but my roomie loved it. I'd send some to her if I could. She's studying down south so very little snow if any.

sunrise view

This is the view from my bedroom window 2 months ago (one of the few sunrises I've actually seen/been awake enough to care to look for ;) since moving here 3 1/2 yrs ago.

Saturday, January 14


This past week has apparently been de-lurking week: where lurkers(readers who don't comment) are asked to say something...anything. I've thought about this myself. I see the visitors. I too have site counters that show that people are reading. I guess it's alright since I don't always comment on the blogs I read. I was thinking that maybe I don't get many comments often b/c I don't ask questions. At least I tend to ask rhetoric ones more often that not. Or I answer them myself. So maybe there's nothing else to add. I guess it's enough that some people are stopping by even for brief visits. Even if they say nothing. So comment if you like. If you don't, then that's fine too.

Friday, January 13

Saw my regular doc today

Saw my regular doc today. Told her I didn't want to take medication and she bought up the idea of counselling so I didn't even have to ask about it myself. Had a long wait for her today. I got there at 225pm for my 230pm appt. Signed in, got stuff checked by the nurse and waited and waited. Didn't actually see my doc until 315pm. Usually the wait is 10-20min. It was ok though b/c I had a book with me. I never leave home without something to read when I have an appt. like hair appt or doctor or dentist. Anyhoo, she's going to have them make an appt for me soon.

I was telling her about how motivated I am now to exercise. Funny thing that. You'd think that the fact that I pay a monthly fee to freakin Bally's (got sucked into stupid 3-yr contract) for my gym membership, would be incentive enough right? But no, it wasn't. I was just throwing my money away, going 2-3 times a month if that. But the thought of having to take medication for anxiety...I am so motivated now. Might have overdone it again. Did 2 sets of exercises on each weight machine instead of the one-set I've been doing since I started exercising again. And also 12min on bike and 25min on treadmill not including warm-up or cool down. It's so good to be able to walk again at normal or brisk without pain. I scared of the elliptical machine and don't even get me started on the stairmaster. So I just stick to the stat. bike and treadmill. With my music on, I actually enjoy it. At least while I'm on it anyway. My legs are quite sore now.

I'm going to bed in like 15 min. Seriously. I've probably only had 4-5hrs sleep or less almost every night this week and I'm exhausted. Was thinking of going to see a movie with GG but am just too tired. I think I'll end up sleeping through part if not most of it. Lately, this overwhelming feeling of tiredness descend on me every night just before 9pm. But I feel it's too early for bed so I ignore my body and try to stay up a little longer. I usu end up falling asleep on the futon in front of tv till 1 or 2am. Then I get up and can't get back to sleep. So I'm going to do it differently tonight. Going to bed in 5min.

Thursday, January 12

I shouldn't be up

I shouldn't be up still. Certainly shouldn't be on the computer but I needed a distraction from my thoughts. I'm glad about writing the crazy letter to Lit. Really, I needed to do it. For my sanity if nothing else. But sometimes I just miss him. I wish I could talk to him. I feel silly and sad and pathetic and stupid and unwanted all at once. I wish he wanted me, even a little. But he didn't then and doesn't now. I wish I could just get over these useless feelings.

Can't sleep for some odd reason even though I'm exhausted. Overdid it a bit at the gym tonight. I was so excited that I could go faster on the treadmill without pain that I was on it for longer and probably faster than I should have. At the time though, it felt good.

Saw the allergy/asthma doc last fri and once I finsh this month's supply of Advair, he says I can go to a lower dosage of it. Really good news. I'm going to see my regular doc this fri. I afraid that she'll still think that I should be on medication for my anxiety. I don't think I'm better exactly or that all the stuff I was feeeling has gone away completely, but I do think I'm working through it and handling stuff better than before. Still having occasional spasms in my hands but not nearly as bad or long-lasting as before. That has to be a good sign. I'm afraid that if I do start taking medication for it, that I'll probably be on it for life. As it is, I'm going to need to take some sort of asthma medication for life. I can deal with that. I don't want ot take anything else. I'm thinking of asking her to recommend a psychologist for me to talk to instead. Cause just taking meds won't stop the stuff that's causing my anxiety in the first place.

Tuesday, January 10

Next Time I'm Calling In Sick

Yesterday was something. Ever have one of those days where you wished you'd rolled over and stayed in bed instead of getting up. I was feeling out of sorts from the get-go. I should have left work at 3pm.

At 330pm, I was loading sample on this instrument for purification and then it got stuck. As I was trying to remove the injection syringe, it splattered crap everywhere. I don't think it got on my skin but it was all over my lab glasses, lab coat and gloves. Ewww. So I got cleaned up. My face felt fine and my eyes weren't burning. All good signs. Today, I found out from our "safety dept" that I have to fill out an incident report. Just great. Pain in the neck-I have to describe the incident on this silly form, then have my supervisors sign off on it then send it to them. But I guess it can't hurt, they just want it on record just in case I have any problems later.

Then after that, I set up a reaction with some really clean material that I'd made earlier. It took about 30min to do b/c I had to cool it first then add another chemical to it slowly. Anyhoo, after all that, I realized that I had used the wrong solvent. Not much else I could do then so I left it to go overnight and hoped for the best.

Today, I checked my reaction and it worked pretty well inspite of the wrong solvent. Might even get a better yield than before. So at least that wasn't the disaster I thought it'd be.

Also, I forgot one of the instruments on overnight. The last person to use it has to shut it down and I forgot. What with the spill and the wrong solvent, it just slipped my mind. Luckily, there was enough solvent so that the instrument wasn't ruined. Could have been a very costly mistake (this instrument cost ~$20k). If it had run out of solvent the pumps would have burnt out and would have to be replaced, not to mention the column. Best not to think about it.

Today was better though. The next time I feel like I did yesterday, I'm calling in sick.

Monday, January 9

I really like the first pic

I really like the first pic, the road sign is pointing to an exit but it looks like its pointing to Stonehenge. Pretty cool huh? My Mum took it from the front seat of the car.

Read an interesting opinion article today from "local" papers - comparing Bush to Don Quixote. It's kinda funny and scary at the same time.

Watching Disney's "Hercules" again. Love this movie. All the elements of a great story - fight of good against evil interlaced throughout with bouts of humour. Definitely one of my fav Disney animated movies.

Sunday, January 8

Stonehenge Pics

Much Ado About Narnia

I enjoyed this movie. I didn't read the books as a kid but I do remember seeing an animated version of them.

My friend E went with me and she said she found the Christian references disturbing. Then she talked about how CS Lewis was friends with Tolkien and was inspired to write the Narnia series partly because of his Catholic/Christian influence. My take-so what? Personally, I don't get what all the hullabaloo is about. The only real Christian reference I see is that of resurrection. Which is not just a part of Christianity but is also part of most major religions. Rebirth, reincarnation, martyrs - all very interwoven into religion/spirituality everywhere. Reincarnation/rebirth of a pure soul or innocent.

Why not just enjoy the movie? Why pick it apart? Sometimes it just seems like people just need something new to talk about. Someone told another friend of mine that she was reluctant to watch the movie even though she enjoyed reading the books b/c of all the "Christian references". I mean, c'mon. Did Jerry Faldwell write it? doctor the screenplay? If you weren't offended by the books, just go see the movie if you're interested. If its not your kind of movie, fine. No problem. I just find it all a little silly.

My friend E also was trying to make a case saying that the 4 children represented apostles. I disagree. So I asked if Edmond was Judas - the only real connection I can make other than the name Peter and the death/rebirth. She said no, she didn't think that. So then what. He betrayed his siblings, didn't he?

I am disturbed by many things, namely, Neo-nazis, white supremists, people who orchestrate and execute terrorist acts among other things. There is true evil in this world. People who think that they are the "chosen" and the only people who should be on this earth. This disturbs me. These people who call themselves Christian and believe that only white people should exist. White meaning non-Jews, non-Hispanic. This is so ignorant-like they even really know what they are. Go back 4-5 generations and I bet many of them would be surprised that they do not qualify as "white" under their definitions of it. I am disturbed by serial killers and people who abuse children who end up back on the streets living among us. Waiting for the opportunity to commit their crimes again. I am disturbed by the violent quality of video games that are made for teens and bought by parents for their kids - games whose main objectives is to steal cars, kill prostitutes, etc. etc.

I'm not offended or disturbed by the Chronicles of Narnia.

Home sweet home

I had a great time with my family. It was really hard this time - leaving them. We all cried a bit the night before. Felt sad most of the way home but on final appoach of the plane to where I live, I felt ok - and I thought...home. I must like living here more than I realised.

We finally made it to Stonehenge. Every day that we planned to go, the weather was bad-snow or rain or too windy and cold. We went the day before I left and it was really cool. Got many pics, some sillier than others :)

Got back to the US and through immigration/customs, in time to catch my connecting flight so I made it home by 530pm on Tues. They didn't bring my checked luggage along with me though. When I got into Newark, it was still in London. By the time I got back to NY, it was only now in Newark. They brought it for me Wed @ 11pm. At least it saved me from having to lug it up the 2 flights of stairs to my apt door.

My car failed to start AGAIN Wed. After getting a new battery for it before my trip. So I called AAA for a jump-start. My AAA membership has more than paid for itself. I took my car to the dealership early Thur. They found that my trunk light was loose and, as a result was on all the time, draining my battery. So they fixed that. $65. I was so relieved. I expected it to cost more for them to figure out what was wrong. Glad it was less than $100.

Been so tired this week. Even though I took Wed off. I woke up at 3am thurs morning. I think I'm finally back on NY time. Going to bed early.

Plans for 2006: Be on-time or early for work/appointments. Exercise regularly.

Was not feeling like going to church today when I got up at 9am. Definitely was not going to choir. So I had breakfast then went outside to my car for my cell(forgot it in the car last night) and decided to take a short walk around my apt (10min). When I got back inside I felt so energized and was actually in the mood to go to church after all. So I had to rush a bit but I just made it there on time. Going to try to do that more often - take short walks when I feel out of sorts.

Saw 2 movies this weekend. Munich: so gory, as one would expect. It was good though. I do think that it would have been better if the order of scenes was different. I found it more distracting the way it was done.
Also saw Chronicles of Narnia. Really enjoyed it. More on that later.