Saw my regular doc today

Saw my regular doc today. Told her I didn't want to take medication and she bought up the idea of counselling so I didn't even have to ask about it myself. Had a long wait for her today. I got there at 225pm for my 230pm appt. Signed in, got stuff checked by the nurse and waited and waited. Didn't actually see my doc until 315pm. Usually the wait is 10-20min. It was ok though b/c I had a book with me. I never leave home without something to read when I have an appt. like hair appt or doctor or dentist. Anyhoo, she's going to have them make an appt for me soon.

I was telling her about how motivated I am now to exercise. Funny thing that. You'd think that the fact that I pay a monthly fee to freakin Bally's (got sucked into stupid 3-yr contract) for my gym membership, would be incentive enough right? But no, it wasn't. I was just throwing my money away, going 2-3 times a month if that. But the thought of having to take medication for anxiety...I am so motivated now. Might have overdone it again. Did 2 sets of exercises on each weight machine instead of the one-set I've been doing since I started exercising again. And also 12min on bike and 25min on treadmill not including warm-up or cool down. It's so good to be able to walk again at normal or brisk without pain. I scared of the elliptical machine and don't even get me started on the stairmaster. So I just stick to the stat. bike and treadmill. With my music on, I actually enjoy it. At least while I'm on it anyway. My legs are quite sore now.

I'm going to bed in like 15 min. Seriously. I've probably only had 4-5hrs sleep or less almost every night this week and I'm exhausted. Was thinking of going to see a movie with GG but am just too tired. I think I'll end up sleeping through part if not most of it. Lately, this overwhelming feeling of tiredness descend on me every night just before 9pm. But I feel it's too early for bed so I ignore my body and try to stay up a little longer. I usu end up falling asleep on the futon in front of tv till 1 or 2am. Then I get up and can't get back to sleep. So I'm going to do it differently tonight. Going to bed in 5min.